Dunga Thoughts:I Appreciate Your Beauty,but...

Earphones are on.I'm scrolling through the playlist to get a song that suits the mood.I settle on Instrumentals and I start with one of my favourite,Vangelis-Chariots of Fire followed by Guantenamera, Friends of Wind by Demis Roussos, Nkosi Sikelel' iAfrika(South African National Anthem).In the list too are songs by Casting Crowns,Reuben Kigame and Dustin Kenstrue.I press play and let the beats and lyrics start to sink.

It's 11 a.m,it's an awkward time to be seated on a Dunga,this are campus benches outside hostels,also known as Jobless Corner as one is seen to be 'lazy'.For me dunga should be referred as an 'eagles eye zone',when alone one can get into deep thoughts together with another,almost similar site,the centre of rugby's pitch.They gave a space  to relax and thinking through life in 3D.I'm just from Project Management class and lecturer's remarks are still live,'...the world is hostile,corruption is massive and played smart the only ones we hear in public is where there are differences when they are sharing out...Nobody thinks about you,they only want to use you to accomplish they selfish life goals...'

With only two months left to be through with studies,the thoughts of where to reside,business,job recruitment s,MRP pressure coupled with the hard facts of the end of an ideal life offered in campus,the laughter,the friendliness are tough pills to come to terms with.

...Phew!,my thoughts are diverted when some ladies pass by,talk of beauty and looks,Wa!(NB;I'm appreciating credit where is due,ha).They are blessed as we like to put it and this reminded me of how this campus is endowed with beauty and Nairobi at large and the World at whole any way.But then,human beings are meant to be with one and there is only one for you,why make a hasty choice?.

When we were in class 8 probably we were 'seeing potentials'  but we smiled or even got caned for our ignorance.It re-occurred in high school we went out for conferences and contests.The same is happening in campus where one could be spotting in readiness for 'transfer window'.How sure are we once we have left this place, 'out there' there will be no Princesses and Princes.

Life is transitions and seasons.The perception we have now towards what's good for us now might change with time but since you had committed,there is not much to do apart from holding on.Let's not make a decision that we only vumilia instead of kujivunia 10/20/50yrs from now.It's a 'roko' mentality(As XN Iraki puts it ) to think the Queen or King can only be found in your campus,county or even country.

For those of who are lucky and have made up their minds I salute them.For those who have 'ish ish',take you time.I bet May's rent and bills will not be paid with hugs and kisses.

(....here comes my friends and the story and thoughts will  change to how Manchester is useless,how Arsenal is no longer the weapon,how Liverpool has been walking alone,...Champions League,Brazil world Cup...)
I should catch up with you later.Get yourself a sit at the nearest Dunga and reflect.

Letter 3 to My Child; On Choices

When I joined Form 1,it was a completely new world for me.Pressure was mounting from all over,hormones were driving me crazy..Got to learn some of this 'skills' as the peers were putting it.
The teachers and parents seemed to be in the old generation and true times have changed but wrong  remained to be wrong no matter how we try to pomp or pimp it.
It wasn't a safe ride especially in my final year where things were almost getting out of hand.

With lots of confusion there are decisions I made that changed my course of life:

-Listening more to teachers and less of my peers.
I didn't have to re invent the wheel to know that something is wrong,especially with moral matters I just tore the line.

-Having a close  friend whom you can share with.
Nguma is the one,I recall us walking home one day and we were vowing by the tarmac road,that we have to go the university regardless of what may come our way.We assisted each other mostly in academics,it's no wonder even after results you could have told the two us had stood out.

-Basing all my actions and beliefs from the bible.If it said don't,I didn't.

-Avoid/Relate with the opposite sex cautiously.
Emotions are running hot they will disorient you.

Son,this will not only help you in school even life after school the principles still apply.
Don't forget the earlier lessons I taught you some years back.

Letter 2 to My Child; On Education

Son,I thank God for the progress you are making,Just the other day you were a toddler!
It's time for you to learn the world while your mum and dad are absent,it's time for school.
I know you will initially hate us for this,but,as time goes by you will appreciate.
This takes me back of the first day I was 'disposed' to an environment that meant separation from my Mama,I cried and tried running away from school to go back to home,any time I did this,I'd be slapped and taken back.
Not that we hate you but we want the best for you.

School is where men are made from boys.Things will change here, you will meet a teacher who is not like your mum,she will beat you up once you make mistakes.You will meet other boys and girls who are not like your cousins,they will be malicious,they will act weirdly,others will laugh at you because of funny reasons but you know what Daddy loves you,the rest doesn't matter.

The education system in this country is not the best but I want you to be ahead of the pack by making you think without the box.Read for the exams and get good grades they will open doors to higher levels of education and exposure but  never forsake the power of your talents.Our brains are wired to acquire massive information,solve problems,do everything that you have always admired around...unfortunately we only use 10% of it!I want you to explore and live your life son...
The Music you listen,the tablet you use,the movies you watch,the vehicle you see,the soccer you watch,the speeches you listen......are all as a result of following a certain passion.Identify it,tell me and we will nurture it.

Son all we want you to get from us is happiness and peace of mind,you don't have to exist in life,live it to the fullest not forgetting our Creator.

Samburu Was Life a Changer.

Saturday Jan 11,2014.
I wasn't sure why I the willingness to go was slowly diminishing,but I said I have to go.At 4 a.m I was up and preparing to board,sleepy I was,bearing in mind we've been from a prayer kesha to pray for the mission.
Off to a land unknown to us.The journey was adventurous as expected filled with natural sceneries till Nyahururu.We changed our vehicles and after a short distance in tarmac road,we entered the rough road,what astonished me is the high speed we were travelling with and the masterly of the road by the driver.At the same time some Samburu's had boarded the same vehicle,all the women had children.I can see the level of illeteracy when the conductor had to explain why the change he was giving was so.All the same we arrived safely at our destination at night around 7:30 pm.
Did I tell you that I had an awesome company along the journey of one blessed,pretty lady,well...

Sunday Jan 12,2014
Woke up at 6am,had been assigned previous churches to attend the service,went to one PCEA Goperian(Gops Kenya,as it was later renamed by one of us).The service was short,the dances were eminently traditional,but the most striking thing is that almost all the ladies can sing,they are blessed with voices.In the afternoon was an open air.
Today,I also met one George who turns out to be a friend and amuses me by telling me,the cost of a plot of land in a town called Loosuk is ksh.7300 payable to the County Government of Samburu,they come with surveyors and erect beacons!

Monday Jan 13,2014
From now onwards waking up was 5 am,and attending the morning devotion.After which we take breakfast pray and leave for door to door.But before we leave I identify a perfect place I used to relax and welcome the sunshine,bearing in minds the nights are freezing cold.The door was an awesome one,but it turns out that we needed a translator in every homestead.We prayed to people,they made commitment to follow Christ,it was rewarding.

Tuesday Jan 14,2013
In the morning in my QT(Quiet time) Zone,where I used to bask for some minutes,one missioner came we talked for some minutes...the rest is a loooooong story.We went for door to door at Loisukutan,had a chance of meeting  Janani&Paul(who again turn to be my friends),Solomon,who explains about the valley from which cattle rustlers from Pokomo used to raid,about an awesome place called Malaso...and in the afternoon,we had an open air under a tree at the same place.Since the journey were becoming longer each day,the phrase,"hapa tu,karibu na booster"(there was a booster at the centre we were residing) turns to be common...To and fro I had a great company emanating from the QT zone...I also loved the Samburu's view,and for the first time the thought of a holiday home at this place crosses my mind.

Wednesday Jan 15 2014
Well,I can't recall the name of the place we went for door to door and open air,all I could say,it's the day that most people gave their life to Christ from the door to door,but on going to the open air the place had resistant.
But for the first time I saw a man baby sitting his kids,that was a taboo like,but gentlemanly.

Thursday Jan 16 2014
Five of us went,"hapa tu karibu na booster", at chief's place where people had been gathered.I've never been emotional like today seeing how people are troubled by sicknesses and other different emotional and cultural issues...I can't forget the fresh and mala milk we took,a great company of one Peter.I can also confirm that samburu ladies especially those that are informed and learned are beautiful,Asha confimed that.Also,Samburu grannies are humorous.

Friday Jan 17 2014
I can't believe our days in Samburu are coming to an end,I'll really miss this place and the people too.
Having interacted with some, learnt their language,preached the Gospel,I felt accomplished.
Today the activities are door to door,open air and revival.

Saturday Jan 18 2014
I can't believe I heard my name yesterday evening to be in the kitchen,the last day..no,no,no...but  I have no option but to cook,It was a hectic day for me...In the morning after having breakfast,there was introductions and sharing of our experiences,and the question"kama umeonekaniwa samburu"(If you have been blessed with a partner while in Samburu)...wa,this question eeeh,.anyway but I made good friends from there,and who knows,Samburu could be where blessing were for me..
I'd also wish to apologise on behalf of the team we were cooking with for making Pilau that had not been fully cooked,Mwanaharusi is in better position to explain this,hehe..
I also wished I was at the open air this day,I could have been with an interpreter but this time round to inter prate my rich samburu language to my fellow missioners

Sunday Jan 19 2014
Having not slept the entire night,we are boarding our vehicle to Nyahururu at 0400hrs,..well,I rarely sleep while the vehicle is moving,it was my moment of reflecting.
I remembered:the souls that gave their life to christ,the miracle that happened to a boy who had no hope of studies,the Samburu friends I met and interacted with,the light moments we had with fellow missioners,my QT Zone,the welcoming nature of Samburu,the hot sun that had now darkened our skins,the passport showers coz of water shortage,the daily goats we ate,the vast flat lands that gave a superb scenaries...I remembered so much,I cherished the memories,I will always hold you dearly in my heart

     
            Kasham oleng' Samburu.Natemaiyan Enkai.

Letter 1 to My Child; On Your Mum

Child,
When I was a young boy,before teenage,there were things I missed doing and enjoying,but as a statement goes,what you don't know doesn't hurt you.I  didn't know what I missed until I got a chance to be a little bit older  and realized,"That must have been a fun and adventurous activity".

Well,I enjoyed the freedom of doing anything I wanted to do as long as I wasn't going to bring trouble to the parents.I liked this.Unfortunately there wasn't exposure to do much,as I can see now and long for,if I had a chance.I blame no one for this,but I have resolved to give the best to you.

It's a pity to see how many rushed into starting families and they were not able to sustain them.
Their end up causing pains to innocent children via divorce,separations and all manner of violence.
I want the best environment for you,one that will expose you and help you explore all you potential

As I wrote down this thoughts,I hadn't met your mum,I was still in campus,but I made a promise to get you the best mum in this world,who will cherish and nurture to make you all that you were meant to be in this life.I know you  wonder why it took so long for you to come to this world but all this was for your benefit.We have been planning for your life.

Wait For Me Dear.

I felt like it's the end of the road for me,I lay on the ground watching the sky.'I can't wait any more'.A thought crossed.The pressure for pleasure is immense.'After all she could be the one'. Another thought.I wasn't ready for another confused quiet moments and so I choose to try something different as a relaxer.I pick a book by Kay Arthur,'With an Everlasting Love',It's just what I need at such a time.Perfect.

Christianna is a young Lady who is betrothed to Joshua,a man whom she has never met but sent his betrothal request via his servant.Because of the word that run across the entire nation of  Joshua's influence and power she couldn't resist but wait patiently.Joshua is said to be the most loved son of the king and every lady and their parents could have wished their daughters be married by him.His Love for her was unconditional...One day Chritianna met Cosmo who shows him material love,ever present for him,hugged her gently and finally overwhelmed by his romance she gives in and loses her precious fruit of purity.Cosmo then disappeared.


The trumpets started ringing.Christianna is remorseful,weeping and being haunted by her actions.She knows that it must be Joshua.Talk of fragrance and beauty that came along with Joshua,it's the most beautiful scene all those who gathered had ever seen.There came Joshua,indescribably handsome,..he entered the room to meet the bride,she was still weeping.The touch with his hands sent her shivering,it's the best feeling ever,She hated Cosmo and cursed him.Then Joshua gently opened the veil in her face,looked at her and said,'I love you Christianna,..if  only had you waited for me'.

Well, the story is an allegory of Christ,If only we can wait for him honestly adhering to his teachings and be guided by Holy Spirit rather than our flesh.
But,it got me thinking of our love relationships.We meet Cosmo who are the romantic,wealthy and great looking ladies and gentlemen of our times.All they are after is the short term pleasure of a moment then puff!,that is the last time you will hear from them,they leave us with scars.

If I seek in my heart daily to make a commitment of strength,hope and patience of not rushing for a now and then gratification,keep the best for Joshua,love them with all that I have even  before meeting them,plan for our future,pray for them...It sounds easy but practically it isn't, but it's possible.
When we meet, it will be a small heaven on earth.You were the ultimate reserve for me,and I was yours forever.When Joshua opens the veil he smile and say, "I Love you,thanks so much for waiting'...Elsewhere,the preacher,"You may now kiss the bride". Fireworks!

Gentlemen Need this...Ladies Require too.

Sometimes back the concept of tall,dark,rough and handsome was very popular among ladies,whereas the figure eight was the,'wa-wa-wa' among men.It was a narrow perspective towards hooking up with ones partner but times have changed.The celebrities were hailed and everyone wished they were their fiance',but we all know how their  lives are behind the scenes and we dread it.Men were the providers of the house,but we live in a world where your woman could be earning more than you and retrenchment is a common scenario.Emphasis on equality places us almost on the same level.

The enormous question is where has the focus shifted too?

Young informed people are no longer viewing life from a 1D perspective but rather,in fact,they are only limited by 3D,they could dissect their partners to-be even further.When we realize that life has more than what we can see and feel,we get critical and approach it from a  wider angle.The earlier we realize this the better.

So what are we supposed to be looking for(both Ladies and gentlemen) from our partners.

1.Mental Maturity.
Nobody want to stay with a person who is just  'yes-yes '..but can question my thought in a reasonable way,so as we can have leverage and synergy.Whenever we stay,even in normal interactions,with people who are just accepting what we offer,what value is being added to you and you already know what you are telling them?. They should be able to critically and analytically think and come up with solutions to problems.Simply because everyone is doing it does not mean is right,it may not apply to our situation.Let's expand our thinking capacity so as we can be of help to our partners,a popular theory suggests that on average most human being use 3-10% of their brain,this is a serious joke,I wonder what the rest we keep like inventory,is for.

2.Spiritual Maturity
Human beings are spiritual beings in human form,and therefore if the spiritual person is not there there is danger of having a numb or dead conscience.Hope no one will complain of irresponsible drinking if you met your partner in a bar or complain of adultery if you one in a multiple of concurrent relationship they were having and you were aware,The  spiritual well being is key to sustain a healthy relationship.

3.Financial Maturity
I'm sure bills will not be paid with hugs and kisses and therefore it calls for stretching our muscle to earn extra coin to sustain a decent lifestyle.

4.Emotional Maturity.
Emotional maturity is when a person has come of age in their feelings. They do not let their emotions run away with them. They can process things that happen in life, deal with them and go on. They are level headed and do not make rash decisions.

5. Social Maturity
This is being able to relate healthily with others and not just being individualistic and living in an island of our own.It's opening up our mind to learn from others too while we choose what to accommodate or disassociate with in a nice and reasonable manner.

6.Physical Maturity.
This is the least in my opinion,..this is where the tall,dark,rough and handsome falls,..the, 'wa-wa-wa' lady is.It's usually very weird for one to be 6-pack,advanced in age,physically beautiful but when they open their mouth you wish they had kept quiet.It's crucial to be physically attractive but it should not be hailed over the other key maturities that matter most since beauty easily fades.