Modern Fresher

Every new Experience brings out our naivety but a good learning opportunity.

Therefore it sounds a good idea to try out new things and be adventurous but all this should be calculated and repercussions should firmly be held in our minds, otherwise…

I remember how grateful I was, to one Susan, for helping me carry my luggage from admission offices to my hostel room in my first day in campus. She told me how good campus life can be, but still how nasty it is for reckless fellows…I heeded and reaped. I made a commitment to myself that I will orient first years when they come, share with them what they expect in their new life being the base of what they want to do their entire life. I did that, hope someone benefited.

But I was perplexed to share with a friend about her first semester in campus and she confessed how they were ‘life changing’:

v  Fresher’s Night

Guys got drank and everything she saw, sorry to mention, can only be seen in a hardcore movie

v  My Best Friend

Her best friend brought her a juice, she drowsed, and when she woke up she was in hands of a man, having been ‘treated’

v  Modern Perspective

A 21yrs old Lady’s logic of not being faithful to one partner, abstaining or using a condom is that even if she gets HIV, she can live with it for more than 25yrs and by the time she is 45,She will have been bored by life and ready to die.

v  Pressure to conform

Her dressing code changed to that which is acceptable to the campus and has swag.

v  Curiosity

Having never tasted alcohol she did that for the first time

…Truly ‘adventurous’

This got me thinking deeply, n you what, I’m yet to come to terms with this.

Email:samac41@gmail.com

If Today Was My Last Day...

Hallo,

I've seen the sense in learning from other peoples mistakes and experiences because I may not live long enough to learn from my own mistakes.

Brownie Ware's experience while working with a palliative care   noted the regrets   of dying people during their last days. They were ;

 1. I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.

It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.


2. I wish I didn't work  so hard.

This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children's youth and their partner's companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.

By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.


3. I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.

Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.

We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.


4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.

It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.


5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called 'comfort' of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.

When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying. 

 

>>>>>> 

When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: “If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you’ll most certainly be right.” It made an impression on me, and since then, for the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: “If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?” And whenever the answer has been “No” for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.-Steve Jobs.

When I shared the above with a group of friends,it was like they do things and live their lives as if they are assured of tomorrow,but we only have an assurance of now because our wishes and hopes may not be God's wishes.

Cheers.

 

 

 

 

Though I Hate It I Find Myself Doing It.

They are certain behaviors I had always wished to stop but I always found myself repeating them like...Therefore I had to find a solution and this is what I did:

#I stopped going to places where things I wanted to stop were being done For example if you want to stop taking alcohol what business do you have with a club?

#I also checked on my dominant passion by asking myself questions like-What do I love,hate,have aversion to,makes me joyful,sad,despair,be angered or makes me courageous and why and Is it worth?

#External senses-I also learnt that one has also to check on what he/she is seeing coz most of mess enters our minds through the eyes and the rest of the 'common senses'.

#Internal senses- Our imagination and memory also play a great role on our behaviors.No one would wish garbage to be served on his/her table but majority do harbour garbage-like thoughts in their minds and they will unconsciously act like so.

#The Intellect also has to be disciplined by having a goal in life-both short term and long term.This is because if one doesn't know what he wants in life then any destination will be Ok with her.

#Will-This is what shoots the target that is set by the intellect.One has to be cautious on how he plans to attain the target just like there is a difference between a woman who loses some pounds of weight by fasting and one who loses the same to keep herself fit.

Guys I wish you the best as you apply this to stop those behaviors that you hate.

The Other Side Of A Coin

I woke up earlier than usual to catch the Citi Hopa bus that was taking us to Mathare North 4B for a clean-up and door-to-door outreach organized by UON-C.U. As usual, while in the vehicle, I did not chat much; I simply enjoyed the ride while contemplating different issues about life.

Out of the gate, past Kabete, Spring Valley, Westlands, and Parklands, I sensed the importance of being ultra-rich from the type of housing structures put in place. Past Ngara Road, I felt that people in that area could be fairly wealthy. In Park Road and Pangani areas, life seemed okay.

The bus finally stopped at the gate of Outreach Ministry in Mathare. I remembered that my late grandpa had spent part of his life somewhere around there, and I had visited him in 2001 after he had refused to leave that place (alikuwa hardcore). We were given directions and started our work by clearing trenches, motivating students, and interacting with the wenyeji.

What surprised me most was the poor sanitation in that place — food being cooked along dirty paths, no toilets or very few toilets that were charged, houses (I think I should not even call them houses, but structures), congestion, chang’aa, and many other problems. Finally, we held an open crusade and left.

As we were coming back to campus, I asked myself several questions:

1. Is life not hopeless among Mathare residents?

2. If the people living in the posh places I had seen in the morning were brought to Mathare, and those from Mathare taken to the posh places, how would Mathare and the posh places look after some years?

3. If one had a village home and land, what would they go looking for in Mathare?

4. Do I remember to give thanks to God for the life I am living and pray?

5. I think it is important to orient your child toward what you would wish them to become. What do you say?

6. Where was the government when these slums were coming up?

I felt disheartened by that life and realized that we are the ones meant to bring change.

All the same, the experience taught me to appreciate life because there are people living in very bad conditions.

Living Life To The Fullest?

Have you ever contemplated on this popular philosophy:Live life to the fullest since you don't know what the next minute holds for you. In other words you might die,it's true but a dangerous approach towards life.


Take an example of a campus setting, per year reported death cases are negligible(less than 2 per year out of the thousands students).Therefore if someone tells you to be extravagant with your resources a little you could be having or advise you to have string of men and fail to consider time value of money by saving or investing the/ladies or taking one for the road...he is misleading because the probability of you being there is very high.

I believe the key to success for young adults is sacrificing now for future purposes in case you will be there you will have less suffering with no guilt of your past.